Dear reader, you read in the previous blog about the clumsy woman.
This story is an update.
And I'll keep it short because right now you are wondering if anyone needs to start contacting Barbara Boxer about getting a quick visa to go to Russia and rescue me from the KGB.
I was sitting next to a sister who needed a cup of tea, so I was moving my four-legged chair so that she could get between me and the bookcase, and she could feel that one chair leg was coming down on her foot, so right away she screamed, and I was so fearful of coming down on her foot that I was trying to lift up my chair, and really I just needed to stand up, and that meant there was even less space for the sister to get between me and the bookcase, so she put out her hand to get her balance since suddenly I was blocking her way to get her foot out from under the chair leg that was coming down on her foot, so she braced herself against the tall bookcase, and the bookcase very very slowly started leaning and leaning, and falling and falling, and dumping and dumping stuff, and crashing and crashing things, but I don't remember hearing the crashing, but there must have been, and I grabbed the sister very tightly as we watched the bookcases tilting and tilting, and then it was quiet, and we just stood there looking at two tall bookcases with the books spilling out of them, and they were stacked so oddly and were pushed up against the chair of the sister who works on the other side of the bookcases, but she wasn't there in her chair that day, and Zhenia came running, and I went for ice for the sister's foot, and she went for Oscar to come look, and we all looked at the bookcases, and the chair still pushed behind them, and then my heart was pounding.
And the brothers quietly and the sisters quietly got all the books out of the spilled places, and we found one broken thing, which was a potted plant, and then I said we shouldn't tell anyone, and Oscar said, yes we should because they would think it was funny, and I said that that was why we shouldn't tell them, and we were all so so so glad the sister Tatiana was sick that day, and the sister icing her foot got up to put her shoes under the bookcase to stick out where the sister's feet would have been if she had come that day, and we were glad that it was just shoes posed there when I took a picture of the bookcases before the brothers put them back, and Oscar said that I was lucky that she was sick that day because everyone in her family is connected to the KGB, and they would be coming after me, and I said the KGB wouldn't be able to find me because if the sister had been there that day, I would have been in Sheol, and no one would be able to find me, not even the KGB.
This story is an update.
And I'll keep it short because right now you are wondering if anyone needs to start contacting Barbara Boxer about getting a quick visa to go to Russia and rescue me from the KGB.
I was sitting next to a sister who needed a cup of tea, so I was moving my four-legged chair so that she could get between me and the bookcase, and she could feel that one chair leg was coming down on her foot, so right away she screamed, and I was so fearful of coming down on her foot that I was trying to lift up my chair, and really I just needed to stand up, and that meant there was even less space for the sister to get between me and the bookcase, so she put out her hand to get her balance since suddenly I was blocking her way to get her foot out from under the chair leg that was coming down on her foot, so she braced herself against the tall bookcase, and the bookcase very very slowly started leaning and leaning, and falling and falling, and dumping and dumping stuff, and crashing and crashing things, but I don't remember hearing the crashing, but there must have been, and I grabbed the sister very tightly as we watched the bookcases tilting and tilting, and then it was quiet, and we just stood there looking at two tall bookcases with the books spilling out of them, and they were stacked so oddly and were pushed up against the chair of the sister who works on the other side of the bookcases, but she wasn't there in her chair that day, and Zhenia came running, and I went for ice for the sister's foot, and she went for Oscar to come look, and we all looked at the bookcases, and the chair still pushed behind them, and then my heart was pounding.
And the brothers quietly and the sisters quietly got all the books out of the spilled places, and we found one broken thing, which was a potted plant, and then I said we shouldn't tell anyone, and Oscar said, yes we should because they would think it was funny, and I said that that was why we shouldn't tell them, and we were all so so so glad the sister Tatiana was sick that day, and the sister icing her foot got up to put her shoes under the bookcase to stick out where the sister's feet would have been if she had come that day, and we were glad that it was just shoes posed there when I took a picture of the bookcases before the brothers put them back, and Oscar said that I was lucky that she was sick that day because everyone in her family is connected to the KGB, and they would be coming after me, and I said the KGB wouldn't be able to find me because if the sister had been there that day, I would have been in Sheol, and no one would be able to find me, not even the KGB.
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Here is some of the destruction, and the evidence that anyone sitting in the chair would have been seriously hurt. 
 This is the picture on the sister's KGB calendar that her family gave to her.  and you can see that the sister isn't there. |
Oh, Arla, what an adventure! I enjoyed your story. Please give Oscar a big greeting and much love from Elton and I. He is like our Russian son!
ReplyDeleteLove to all,
Judy Karr
One again, I love your stories. You're having lots of adventures. This one is funny, although perhaps only in retrospect. I know all the sisters are okay, and everyone loves you!
ReplyDeleteI think instead of being called the "Whereabouts of Arla" it should be called "The Adventures of the American in Russia."
ReplyDeleteLOL! But actually it's not that funny...glad no one got hurt, and that you could write an entertaining story about it. By the way, do you a poetic liscense for that run-on? ;)
ReplyDeleteHa ha, dear gir! Yes, it is ONLY funny since the shoes are there as a reminder of the near devastation and nothing more. You can imagine how Tatiana felt when she looked at the pictures! She was probably glad she had been sick too!
ReplyDeleteWell, if you look at my run-on "sentence" carefully, you will see that it is correctly punctuated throughout! Ha ha, it reads like a run on, but it is meticulous in the commafying, and the license is still intact. Thanks for noticing my rhetorical style. That makes me happy.